YOUR FIRST FATHER'S DAY? HOW COME?

My father loves me!!!

My father:

When my father new I was in my mother’s womb, he was so happy.  He took time off his job to go with her to every single doctor’s visit.  The visit he liked the most was that of the day he was able to see me in a monitor, “it’s a girl” the technician announced and according to my mom, who started to cry and laugh at the same time due to joy, my father was exited and happy to have his first girl.

My boyfriend:

I was educated for a different kind of future, but I became pregnant, at 15, my boyfriend, 19, left me on my own to deal with it.  I was terrified, I didn’t know how to tell my parents.  I knew better, and abortion was not an option.  

HOW COME, I continued with the idea that he was “the man” for me?  

My father:

Came from work every single day, happy to see me.  Now I understand how tired he most have been after work, but he took time to play with me, read books to me, feed me and kissed me good night.

HOW COME, I waisted my time over the phone with my boyfriend to convince him that he needed to “step up to the plate” and assume his responsibilities.  I also wasted my energy, and tears every time I knew he was “out there” hanging, with other girls, his age.

My father: 

Divided the responsibilities with my mother and some days took me to school, to the dentist's appointments, immunization appointments, so my mother didn’t have to cry with me, and together they attended my school shows.

My boyfriend:

Almost four months into the pregnancy and he was still hiding from my parents.

HOW COME, I continued calling him, telling him to show his ass up at my house.  I begged him to be a father.

My father:

Agreed with my mom to invite my boyfriend over to see what the hell he have to say.  I was so happy that day, I had him with me, we will be a family now.  A new kind of trust from my family was open for us.  I felt it was approved, finally.

My boyfriend:

Fooled all of us, with his costume for the occasion, his best manners and his words full of shit.  My mother never believe him.

HOW COME, I accepted his nothing.  He, a 19 year old dropped out, no job, no respect for his own family, expert in video games, young girls, lies, sneaker and hats collection... what the hell I was thinking.  Do I like cute bad boys and loosers?  

My father:

Contributed to my mother’s idea of instead of a “sweet 16” I could have a heck of a baby shower fiesta.  It was so beautiful, my friends and family came over.  Gifts, photos, food... my parents made me feel so special!!!  

My boyfriend:

At least helped in the clean up!!!

HOW COME, I just wanted to have him near me, with me, like those dolls I have in my room that I don’t play with anymore, but are mine, and I still want them there in the corner collecting dust.

My father:

Always, together with mom made sure I had all I needed.  He was and still goes the extra mile to make sure I move on in life.  

My boyfriend:

Didn’t make an effort to find a job, in order to buy a can of formula.  Was not able to help me care for the baby in order for me to go back to school, where he took me from.

HOW COME, I'm allowing this to happen!!!  Expecting so much from a person that have never shown any signs of self respect.

My father:

Still show so much respect for my mother.  My mother makes herself be respected.  My parents had their arguments, hard headed people I have to say, but my father NEVER touched my mom.  I never experience my mother been abused by my father or anybody else.

My boyfriend:

I allowed him to physically abuse me.  This secret that scared me so much, I told my parents and family.  

HOW COME, I allowed so much disrespect, so much humiliation, so many lies, so many false hopes, so much waiting for nothing?

My father:

Still there for me, together with mom.  They still believe in the tools they game me to build up my life properly.  Their strength before all the troubles I caused: running away, cutting classes, my fake stories to my teachers, to my parents, I even said I was not pregnant but I can’t mess with my mother... they still there for me!!!

My boyfriend:

I’m moving on, with my daughter and with the ones that love and respect me, my family.

HOW COME...

It’s Father’s Day... BUT THIS IS MY FATHER, FATHER’S DAY!!!

Report/Expression by Coqueta
® 2012

Here with my dad in the ER, he is making fun of the way I was crying after I closed the car's door with my fingers in it.  Photo taken by mom.

A Christmas Story of Revenge

Stories
Sweet Revenge
I would like to share this story that I received at CoquetaClub@gmail.com by one of my Coqueta members. The identity is kept confidential as I always guarantee my members.


Coqueta:
I have a relationship with my boyfriend for five years. He lives by himself and I live with our daughter in my apartment. Our daughter is four years old. Basically, we do all together (celebrations, vacation, trips, shopping, etc) except living as a couple in the same home.
He is very jealous and manipulative to the point that I feel I can’t move a step without letting him know about it. If he calls and doesn’t find me he gets mad to the point that don’t talk to me for days, even a week and stop visiting us.
If I call him and I don’t find him he always has an excuse that I have to take whether I like it or not.
I work over his will just because he won’t provide to us what we need, and also because he found very convenient not to give up all his money. But he will be very happy if I just stay at home and no one sees me.
I’m 29 years old and I look good. I have a degree from college and I have a good job. He is 30 years old and also has a college degree and a good job that pays him double of what I make.
I asked him to marry me but he said he don’t believe in that. I had try to end the relationship but I always get stuck with our daughter due to the fact that I don’t want her to suffer and I continue doing things together with him for her happiness.
Whenever he wants he takes vacation without us. He loves to vanish from time to time and there is no way he will explain to me where he was at and with whom. But I have to be available for him at all times, and if I don’t answer his calls or I stop all contact with him he will accused me of being with someone else, or even call me the B word.
I have been loyal to this man and I love him very much but I know my feelings are changing because I don’t see any growing as a couple. I see my life flying by and no plans to build for the future. He keeps treating me as I’m stupid, trying to tell me what to do, how to laugh, how to dress, what friends not to have, where to go, and how to live my life.
Our intimacy is very good but I feel empty when he gets up in the middle of the night, afterwards, and leave me, us. I have shared all my feelings about our relationship, my dreams, and my hopes, but he just wants to continue the relationship just as it is.
All our encounters end up in an argument and me crying by myself.
The other day we went Christmas shopping to a mall out of the town we reside. We went in my car. I was in a good mood so my daughter. He was in a good mood too. He told me he wanted to go to the men's clothing store and suggested me to go on to the shoe store and I agreed. After about 20 minutes he called me in my cell to find out where I was. I told him I’ll walk to the store he was at and I did with my daughter by the hand.
Just when I was arriving to where he was standing two guys walked by me and they looked at me. One of the guys said something like “hi beautiful woman”. I kept walking looking into the eyes of my boyfriend who changed his face from happy to mad.
He asked me, "what that guy said to you?”, and I told him I didn’t understand. My boyfriend argued that I was lying to him. I got so mad that I told him it’s not my fault that other guys find me beautiful and are not afraid to say it. My boyfriend immediately asked me if I knew them, if I wanted to go shopping with them.
I felt so insulted and sad, but I decided I was not crying this time. I told my boyfriend I was going to the restroom and he did the same. But I didn’t stay in the restroom. I walked as fast as I could to the parking lot. I felt my heart pounding in my chest like I was doing something so bad, but I was determined. I got into my car and I left him there, miles away from our city, and I felt safe and in charge of my life.
I don’t remember how many calls I received from my boyfriend after I told him I left him there. He called me all kind of names but I didn’t care. Suddenly he reminded me I had his keys in my bag. Hallelujah! He told me if I was capable of going into his car or even into his place he will put me in jail.
It was not my plan to do that, but he placed that idea in my mind. My plan was just to get even for all this time he underestimated me, I just wanted to feel respected, strong, in charge, and I just felt that way.
But, I really wanted to find out what he was hiding. The first thing I did I went into his car that was parked out of my apartment. I stopped answering my cell and he left me all kind of messages.
I opened the front compartment I found condoms, blue pills, and the registration of his car with an address that was not where he lives. I opened his trunk and I found female articles like sunglasses, blouses and jewelry, it was not mine.
I went to my apartment got into the internet and I found the address on his car registration. I got there! I knew I had time, not just because he was far, but he had no car and there was no way he will call his friends to tell them I left him in a mall. (I’m laughing right now with such a pleasure).
He had a bunch of keys and one of the keys had a number on it, I found the mail boxes. I opened and there was the name of a woman. I went to the door and a woman answer the door and I told her I was the girlfriend of _______ and this is our daughter. The woman colors changed on her face. I continued telling her that I just wanted to leave his car keys with her. Is there any problem I asked her, and she nodded no. I pass the keys to her and I told her that I could not understand how she could live her life as a part time lover, because I couldn't handle it myself. 

I told her, "you knew about us, and I can see you are a good person, but I can also see you are not happy. Good luck to you." I called my boyfriend and I told him that I was standing in front of his "friend" and that I passed the keys to her (except his apartment's), there was silence. I left his friend's apartment and she didn't say anything at all, she looked more scare that I was.
Last stop; his apartment. I got in, I found more condoms, blue pills, jells, sex toys, books for hotels, motels, discount cards for rooms, traveling paraphernalia and hidden in the last draw of his dresser my daughters cards and pictures. I took all of them with me. I trash his entire apartment, one room at a time, while moving my daughter so she could not see it.
I went home feeling like I was "the few, the proud", and a super woman.
My boyfriend spend his Christmas trying to argue with me about what I did is punishable by law, I laugh so much. Then I didn’t hear from him, probably because he was in a good company. Who cares?
The New Year is coming and I’m feeling like a million dollars. I have dreams and plans that I want to realize all of them together with my daughter. My daughter will continue sharing with her dad on their own time without me. 

As you always say Coqueta, LIFE IS GOOD.
What a sweet revenge.
What do you think, Coqueta?
Coqueta Member

DEAR COQUETA MEMBER:
What do I think? I think I'm very proud of you. You have just follow the Coqueta Rules of doing what is right. You also did the sweet revange, where no one gets hurt, but all gain something. You got back your sense of freedom and that is priceless.

In this case, you boyfriend learn that you are not an object, but a beautiful human being with goals, dreams and freedom. A person that deserves to be respected, valued and loved.

I'm also sure that his girlfriend, now at the no so secret place, is starting to think about herself a little bit more, and very soon she will leave him in a far away land, I hope she leaves him in Europe without passport and ID.

And for you my dear Coquetita, keep growing, be good, dream at large and continue your life. Happiness is in your heart and no at anyones hands.
Always
Coqueta
® 2007

La venganza es dulce